For those who missed last week’s performances, here’s a recap:
And here are the results!
Top 16: Team Keith.
The Public chose Darren Percival and Brittany Cairns, which kind of baffled me. Diana Rouvas’ performance was the best of the entire competition. Luckily, she was always going to be saved. Darren and Brittany both show signs of talent, but even Rock Eisteddfod does occasionally.
Keith stepped in to make the two decisions that the public should have. Diana Rouvas and Adam Martin were best on ground last week – thank god for the judge’s vote.
Top 16: Team Joel.
The public redeem themselves with Sarah De Bono before cocking everything up with Lakyn Hepari. Attention teenage girls, the only song that Lakyn should be singing public is “99 bottles of beer” when he heads back to camp on the special bus.
Joel makes the obvious decision in Ben Hazlewood and Prinnie Stevens. The reality now is that there are eight great singers left and eight shit ones.
Tonight, Delta and Seal‘s Top 4 perform.
Chris Sebastian – I Can’t Stand The Rain
Great of Chris to finally turn up to the competition. Admittedly, his performance was pretty special but after surviving multiple rounds that he shouldn’t have, he’s going to have to do a lot more to get Australia on side.
Danni Di Ros – When Love Takes Over
If anyone was going to take this song on, it was Danni. What a set of pipes she has! The performance was so blistering, I barely noticed that she was about as sexy as an howler monkey.
Emma-Louise Birdsall – The Look of Love
WHAT was Seal thinking? Emma has proven her vocal dexterity and he gives her a song that’s so boring, it made Tina Arena sound like Metallica. Seal described it as a “Song of vulnerability,” which is perfect, given that she’s vulnerable of being voted off next week. Does anyone else think she looks like the mother in Charlie & The Chocolate Factory?!
Viktoria Bololnina – Smells Like Teen Spirit
Poor Viktoria. Smells like teen burning flesh really, because Delta publicly trialled Viktoria like it was The Crucible. Watching a credible performer reduced to sounding like Eurovision-trash was humiliating for all involved. Here’s a pic of Delta after choosing Nirvana.
Team Seal gather to sing Kiss From A Rose on The Grave of Seal’s career. It’s exactly what you’d expect – a giant waste of time that keeps the show at two hours. Because none of us have social lives…or jobs…or sleep needs.
Glenn Cunningham – Closer
A huge improvement on last week, it went to show that Delta chooses a lot better when she’s not trying to be cool with the kids. But please, do us a favour – don’t try to turn him into a sex symbol. Then again, Seal is considered a sex symbol and his face looks like the Germans tested chemical weapons on it.
Fatai V – Ave Maria
Holy shit. For 16 years old, Fatai has some banging vocals. Obviously the highlight of the night and one of the whole season. I must say, I’m sick of fucking Seal freakily manhandling his contestants like the Boogieman. I haven’t seen a gatekeeper this aggressive since Joseph Fritzl.
Verdict: Stay (Best on ground!)
Fatai V – Ave Maria
Rachael Leahcar – Someone To Watch Over Me
A cynical friend of mine last week told me he’s convinced that she’s not actually blind. After about five minutes of arguing like it was some fucked up episode of Law & Disorder or Boston Legal-ly Blind, he ended up admitting that it was irrelevant. We agreed she is terrific – another gorgeous vocal.
Karise Eden – Landslide
It wasn’t her best performance to date, but it was still in the top four of the evening. I think the general public need more big notes to vote, but I will hopefully be proven wrong.
A perfect end to the show: If you ever needed a song that summarised Delta‘s choice of Nirvana – it’s Born To Try. Same time next week kids – peace out!