So now Carmengate has come and gone, the show must go on. Just ask one of her friendly competitors who explains, “She’s here with us tonight,” like she’s dead. Usually when people say that, they don’t look so ecstatically happy! For those who missed last week’s performances, here’s a recap:
And here are the results!
Top 16: Team Seal.
The Public votes went to Emma Louise Birdsall & Karise Eden. Well done Australia, the two best on ground were chosen. Perhaps making people actually BUY the music means that pretty boys won’t go through anymore?!
Seal’s votes went to Fatai V & Chris Sebastian. Fatai was a commendable choice but Chris?! So, when is the show going to be renamed “The Person Who Best Deals with the Press”?!
Top 16: Team Delta.
The public rightly chose Viktoria Bolonina, given her astonishing rendition of Bang Bang last week. Rachael Leahcar was another solid choice. The public absolutely nailed it.
Delta then immediately fucks everything up by choosing Glenn Cunningham. Maybe Keith wasn’t crying happy tears during last week’s performance, Delta. Maybe those were ear-rape tears? Delta then redeemed herself with Danni Da Ros. The consequences of choosing the geriatric or One Directionite would have ended in bloodshed.
Now, to the next eleven performers.
Darren Percival – Paul Young
“Fantastic song choice”? If you haven’t turned on the radio since 1982, maybe. Darren Percival has an amazing voice, but if Keith Urban keeps picking songs like this, Darren will be back to being Quentin Tarantino’s body double in no time!
Verdict: Stay (only for the voice.)
Prinnie Stevens – Turn Me On
Prinnie was relatively unchallenged in the R&B department (hello Diana Rouvas) and while the track had faulty moments, she did enough to secure either a public or judge’s vote to get through. They say Prinnie Stevens is the Aussie Beyonce, so here’s Prinnie below after seeing Diana Rouvas’ take on Beyonce’s Love On Top later in the evening (I’m guessing that phone call is voting for herself?)
Verdict: Stay (but only because 8 stay)
Adam Martin – Lonely Boy
Kudos for tackling The Black Keys, an almost untouchable band, given their reputation as live performers. I have no recollection of Adam Martin before this performance, but he has propelled himself into one of the best in the whole competition.
Sarah De Bono - Listen
Holy shit!!! Best performance of the entire season and precisely why the show is on. I’m already dying my hair fire-engine red. Best on ground. The video hasn’t surfaced yet on YouTube but PLEASE watch below!
Verdict: Please win the whole series.
Jimmy Cupples – Sweet Child Of Mine
I don’t know what it is, but there’s something very unlikeable about Jimmy. Sure, he’s a talented singer and he did Guns N Roses justice, but the dude doesn’t make me feel anything. I think a sweet child of his would look something like this…
Ben Hazlewood – Lego House
Between his good looks and gifted vocal abilities, Ben Hazlewood is more like Ben Ladywood, which every girl in Australia is experiencing right now. There are things that I would do to Ben Hazlewood, that would involve The Voice of a Jury incarcerating me for a very long time. Below is my perfectly normal reaction to seeing him on stage. 3rd best on ground.
Verdict: Take your top off…I mean stay!
Taga Paa – Fight For You
What. Was. That? If Jason DeRulo’s re-working of Toto’s Africa wasn’t painful enough, watching Jonah’s friends from Summer Heights High completely upstage Taga was demoralising on every level.
Laura Bunting – Somebody That I Used To Know
Considering she shouldn’t even be here today, taking on the world’s biggest song of the last year is extremely gutsy/stupid. While Laura attempted a Kimbra-esque solo version, it just didn’t work. Some songs should be left to the originals and now she’s just somebody that we used to have to listen to.
Diana Rouvas – Love On Top
Diana is another performer I don’t really remember, but she absolutely NAILED Love on Top. It was fearless, effortless and thankfully, not a Beyonce knock off – it was genuinely unique. A VERY CLOSE 2nd best on ground. Unfortunately, the video isn’t up on youtube – the link is below.
Lakyn Heperi – Forever Young
Lakyn does absolutely nothing for me. NOTHING. I find him boring, without stage presence and has a vocal slur that sounds like Sean Penn’s closing speech in I Am Sam. His pretty looks cannot distract his blatant lack of talent.
Verdict: Piss off.
Brittany Cairns – Different Worlds
Oh, is the show still going?
After the public votes of last week selected the best four, if Adam, Diana, Sarah and Ben get chosen tonight, then the other eight put through by the judges are just buffers. You can tell from the progression from Top 24 – 16 that the producers didn’t trust the public to make the best decisions (hence the judge’s saves), which might just now go to waste. We’ll find out next week.